CroutonsOfDeath's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Hardon Potter]

This is terrible. I love it!

My wife is into weird shit, I tells you. I wake up to her laughing her arse off and I stumble over drowsily and tells me I gotta see this. My reaction:

"hahahah what the fuck hahahaha that was fucking hysterical."

This is gross-out humour done right, it doesn't feel forced but it's just fucked up enough to work. Plus, the faces, the voices, and the music make it so much better. Some of Harry's expressions make me laugh harder each time I see it, and the voices are disturbingly hilarious as well. I love you Oney.

I had to favorite this.
+fav +4 +8

[Ça Ça Mirlaquerr]

Holy balls

I remember Mr. Coo! I was so happy when I saw his name pop up again. This had everything I liked about the old ones, it had beautiful and absolutely slick animation and the inventive antics flow with the animation, creating a rare, near perfect and absolutely beautiful scenario where the ideas, the art, the animation all compliment each other. This is called synergy, and be glad your 'toons have it - because by definition, no one else does. That's something incredibly special that only a few animators here can claim. Treasure your work just as much as your dedicated fans, and keep that synergy going as long as you continue to have these wonderful ideas.

It should be of note that I rarely give out 10's unless the game or film is truly and unquestionably perfect, and this hits that tricky bullseye for me. Seeing animations like this make me happy - as much as I love Newgrounds, there's no denying a lot of it's humour derives from pop-culture, video games, parodies, vulgarity and the like - so spotting true art on this site reminds me why I still peruse Newgrounds even when I'm not in the mood for cheap guffaws.

This is such a beautiful animation, with an awesome song, and 100% originality that I probably need to shut up now. I've analyzed it enough, TL;DR - you created art here. +fav +5 +10 and another +5 whenever I show it off or replay it on a later date =) Keep up the excellent work.

[Cat Dust]

D'awww

That was really cute! I don't care if the internet is so full of them that it's practically made of them (That's a reference! +5 internets and +5 cookies if you got it :D) I am a huge cat fan and enjoy good cat humour; which this was. It was a really fun concept and I think you executed it well.

The animation was also fairly smooth and nice (With a few lags, though not too many) although admittedly the artwork could use work. It was just somewhat rough around the edges and felt inconsistent at times, in some scenes the protagonist (Joseph? I thought I saw that name appear in a caption...) had stick arms and it was jarring to suddenly return to him actually having a frame.

I also admit the sound could have used some work. Some of the cartoon sound effects seemed timed poorly, and others didn't really seem to fit at all. Plus the way you used and reused the same stock cat sound effects got mildly annoying.

Really though, that's just nitpicking. Better art and sound would be nice, yes, but they didn't detract from how fun watching it was - so I won't drag your score down because of it. This deserves a solid 8 and a +Fav. =)

[In Ten Years ..]

Song?

What is the name of the song? It is beautiful! I also like your author comments. The flash itself, well, it's nothing remarkable but it's clock day and it is not in the spirit of clock day to give such petty criticisms and I can tell you care about the clocks!

Happy Clock Day, all hail Strawberry Clock the king of the portal and here is to 10 more years of B!

[Animator vs Animation III]

A well deserved 10

I'm pretty stingy about giving out 10s, I really only do it when I genuinely found nothing wrong with the flash in question. Yet the fact that you've managed to keep this idea fresh 5 years since the original shows that you have talent and a passion to keep the idea from feeling retread or monotonous. This is one of those animations that you can just sit back and enjoy, and it is even better for us computer dorks.

The animation is very smooth, and while I could be a petty asshole and complain about the use of stick figures in the art, it is clear that the stick was simply intentional and not a lack of artistic talent and the way the computer files and icons were manipulated is top notch, it really is seamless in that regard. It actually reminds me a little of an old Muppets game and a few screen savers where the characters interact with your computer desktop in a fun way, and I'd love to see an "Animator Vs Animation" style version of that fact for your very own desktop and your programs. It would take time, but it would be awesome.

Anywho - this was excellent all over and fun, entertaining, well made and it has a lot of charm, just like the previous ones. 10, 5 and Fav'd!

[Bronies]

Brilliant

I was honestly afraid to click on this flash for fear it would be yet another "WHY YOU SHOULD BE A BRONY!" propaganda short, but this isn't YouTube so I gave it a chance and knew it would be gold when I saw Spazkid on the helm.

You and your pals are fucking masters at satirizing Internet folk and fads, and doing it without thinking that adding memes = satire. The animation is also fucking awesome and overall this flash is brilliant. Sums up the whole Brony thing perfectly. Fucking love it.

[Pokemon PoopBrown Version]

Mixed...

Mixed feelings about this flash. Considering you are working with Pokemon sprites, they aren't too bad though some smoothing would be nice. There are some moments where the editing is really, really poor almost like there is no real end to a certain scene or shot. Though that only really happened a couple times, otherwise it wasn't bad.

As far as the humour and story; a couple parts were smile worthy, but honestly it isn't my kind of humour. For the most part I didn't really laugh or care about what was going on, the timing was somewhat awkward and I guess I don't find humour in the premise of "Team Feces is turning people brown!" Regardless, it could have done worse with that premise; something like that could sink to *shudder* SeltzerBerg levels. Thankfully, it didn't go that low and while I simply don't think it was funny, I can't say it's bad for the type of humour it is. I think the parts I smiled at were the scenes with Professor Oak, the quick manly "Skitty" voice and the ending regarding the names of the sequel. In fact, that ending bit DID get one laugh out of me - so there you go. It was a bit long though...

One other positive, the voice acting. It was all pretty high quality and while I didn't like all the voices, I can't slight the quality and effort. In fact I'd argue they were probably the most technically sound aspect of this animation.

I guess in the end, I can see why a lot of people like it and it isn't bad for what it is but it isn't my thing. I can see that there was some effort put into it when compared to many other sprite flashes out there, but it simply didn't do much for me - even if I did smile at a few things and chuckle at the end. So for effort, good voice acting, professor Oak and the ending - you get a 6.

Eastbeast responds:

Thanks for the review. I know there were alot of crunches to keep the file-size low, so I ended up having to cut up the songs and make them loop, although I don't think it was done badly, but there were some places I just couldn't put music because of the file size.

[Great Destiny Man 2]

Mad skills, as expected.

Dammit Chris, where do you get such mad talents? Who were your parents, cause you clearly came from perfect sperm. Your animation and artwork is still some of the best here on newgrounds, and of course your humour and sense of style is impeccable.

I rarely give out 10s anymore unless the flash is genuinely nigh perfect, but dammit you deserve that 10! Continue all your sexy, mind bogglingly amazing flashes.

Sexual-Lobster responds:

thanks croutons!
i don't think i can really comment on the quality of my father's sperm but i wasn't very good at art when i was young so i think practice wins over talent

[Poontah!]

Animation won me over

The animation was absolutely STUNNING. It was what truly won me over, I absolutely loved it! It made me think of a mix of Egoraptor (The extreme faces; especially the Chieftain or whatever he was) and old school hand drawn Warner Bros. cartoons. It was fluid, fun to watch, etc. I hope you make the rest of your flashes at this quality as well.

As for the flash itself, it was funny - but one thing did bug me. It's just personal opinion, but I don't think you should have had the blood. I am fine with blood and gore in cartoons and such but the reason it bugged me is the joke, as is, is borderline "rape" joke. Since it didn't actually show forced penetration or truly horrific screaming it didn't upset or offend - but the blood almost pushed it over for me. That's just a nitpick though, it could have obviously been much more graphic.

Still, worth a subversive chuckle and I cannot stress how much I adored the actual animation/artwork shown. Good show!
4/5
8/10
+fav